Wires and bibles, boxes and scribbles: there is a man waiting for me at the door, he says he likes me.
I’m pondering about the sex market and how I can’t break in, I’m such a nice fellow— I just need a little finishing: of a truth dear, I’m ugly.
He bought a purple carved sitter, it is for relaxing or fucking — I rode him till he came, he sneezed upon me; life is a bit not fair, and I understand that everyone struggles with a demon and that black is a colour for sadness and blue for pain.
My mother calls herself a slave, she works so hard she claims— Why don’t you feel my pain? Why are you never obedient to me— I’m not even loyal to myself.
I’m weighed down by responsibility, you could blackmail me easily or emotionally. Chips fry happily on a fire, if I pass through fire, will I be this happy?
Rub a cat and it will fall in love with you, maybe I should rub my mother—it is hard for me to be still, I dreaded my hair twice, I hated it thrice. Give me money when you fuck me , I will use it to buy food, and keep some for school. I hate to fight with mother, I don’t think she likes me much.
My tears fell into the coco pops I’m eating— I ate my tears you can say. To avoid being pregnant again I took a family planing implant.
I will be 22 next month, my 21 was bitter, I see the lateness of my thought, I was roofless and wet, I killed a baby, found weed, had multiple sex partners, fucked on my period, had a lesbian mate, made a video of my masturbation and my sister found it, almost tried anal, slapped my cousin, was gifted a cat, went to camp, cried a lot, saw my friends cried so hard as her boyfriend broke up with her— they swore they will get married. I fucked a man I thought was good for mum, he was a fraud from the start, haven’t still found love, had an orgasm and cried, fell into dept, read books, found poetry, kissed my baby cousin I guess I was mushy, my cat tingled with my breast- he didn’t like it much, went for job interviews, waited out in the cold for a man I didn’t like, on Christmas day, I shaved my hair, had a heated argument with my sis- I had to let that out, David is still the best thing to ever happen to me, met an old medicine man in Maiduguri for answers, I want to be attractive but I don’t know how, got an invite for a threesome, it was called off five minutes to the time, danced naked under the rain, I learnt to forgive after being fucked by a guy five days to his wedding on his matrimonial bed, he claimed to love me, I started squatting but gave up, I guess a bigger butt is not for me, I tried a new recipe for making noodles, I still Don’t like pepper, the sky is beautiful when you are not looking.
I’m a mysterious being.
Who am I?